Whistling. What is it? It is, quite simply, the act of pushing air through one’s lips to produce a sound. Most people have done it. Some people do it well. Others do it poorly. Why do they do it? Nobody knows.
I was reflecting on this very subject Tuesday evening when Koko walked across my desk and sat directly on my notes. This was, of course, no accident. Koko has an IQ that would humble most faculty members at the community college, and his deliberate placement of his hindquarters on my legal pad was clearly a statement about the fundamental nature of oral expression. Yum Yum, meanwhile, stole my pen. I choose to believe she was editing.
My moustache tingled as I considered the deeper implications. Whistling has a long history in Moose County. Miners used to whistle in the old days. Now people whistle while they walk down Main Street, assuming they haven’t been murdered, which in Pickax is never a safe assumption. Just last month there were two arsons and a suspicious poisoning at the Old Stone Mill, which brings this year’s total to a number I’d rather not think about. Police Chief Brodie mentioned, somewhat pointedly, that I had dined at the Old Stone Mill the evening before the incident. Coincidence? Of course it is. Why would anyone suggest otherwise?
I considered researching the musicological dimensions of whistling but decided against it, as the library charges twenty cents for photocopies and the K Fund cannot be expected to absorb every frivolous expense. The Fund does, however, underwrite my cats’ organic food, which is a legitimate cultural preservation expenditure and my accountant agrees completely.
Speaking of the cats, I must note that a chickadee has been stealing from the birdfeeder I reluctantly maintain outside the barn. Koko watches it with an expression I can only describe as prosecutorial. Is the bird whistling? Possibly. Is it mocking me? Almost certainly. Should I care? Probably not, and yet here I am, writing about it, which is more than Moose County deserves on a Wednesday.
Whistling.
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